WIP: sweater blanket

inspired by the book sewing green, which i got from the library (i love you, inter-library loan!), i started a new project this week. i started by buying a bunch of wool and cashmere sweaters at salvation army. i felted them in a hot wash and dry and started cutting them up.

bee helped me with laying out the pieces so we could get a sense of what it would be like and if i had enough sweaters.
next i started squaring them off and assembling them like a frustrating little puzzle. 

then i put the whole thing away by rolling it up, in an attempt to pace myself so that i do a careful job and actually enjoy it. i can't wait to roll it out this weekend and start to sew the pieces together. i'm using an old sheet for the back and it should be a nice size for a lap blanket or and extra blanket for bee or henny's beds.

consolation

tonight bee came up to me and started peeking under my shirt as she rattled on about one thing or another. this new habit of her looking under my shirt is something that i am trying to be cool with, despite my natural awkwardness. i still have a lot of issues about my body and how it is changed now forever, after having two babies. i feel ok about it in my own head but when i think of how i look to the general population, i am horrified. i can look at the changes and see them as beautiful in their own way, i am just not convinced that anyone else will. and that is where my issues are, i guess.

anyhow, back to tonight. 

bee was chatting away and looking at my side, where the worst of the worst of my stretch marks reside. suddenly she stopped talking and announced, "this mark looks like an 'm', see."

yes, an "m". bee's first initial. of course that is the connection that bee made. she knows that she made the mark and of course it only makes sense that her initial is there. 

i know that in bee's eyes that is just the kind of magic that is so believable to a kid. i want to believe in that magic. it helps to make this body more livable, more lovable. i want to save this thought to share with bee someday. to thank her for helping me through my issues.